Carrying Our Fear
Carrying Our Fear
“This summer, my partner Fred and I were visiting Cahors, a medieval village in French Occitanie. It was sunset and as we wandered the dark narrow streets, we came upon a place where a group of men were drinking. They were jostling outside the bar, loud and rowdy in their matching white T-shirts and black bow ties. It had to be a bachelor party given the costumes and raucous energy, and I instinctively turned down a side alley to avoid them. It was a dead end.
As I backtracked, the only option was to inevitably walk past them. I held Fred’s hand and tried to feel his calm. He couldn’t have cared less about the testosterone-charged air. Meanwhile, I was on edge, ready to deflect whatever comment might get hurled at me. My body was tense, stiffening, the same way it would during years of catcalls.
Since moving to Paris, I’ve been followed home on two separate occasions. And it wasn’t subtle. Both men were right next to me, talking the entire time. You’re so beautiful. What’s your name. I’ll take you for a drink….”
November column for Epiphany Magazine about epigenetics, charged bodies, and inherited fear.